How it feels to have an eating disorder

Having an eating disorder really is like living in a nightmare. Plagued by self doubt, fear, and self loathing, normal, everyday activities feel like uphill struggles. Your mind is in a strait jacket,  completely controlled by obsessive thoughts, numbers, self criticisms.

It feels as though there is no possible way out of this perpetual inferno of negative thoughts.

It is difficult to explain in words how it feels when you finally shake off the shackles of the eating disorder, and anything I say may seem trite, but it really is as though you rise from a pit and touch the heavens. It’s as though your mind has been released from a vice and you can soar free as a bird.

The only prison there is is in our minds. We create our own heaven and hell. We can choose at any time to release ourselves…all we need to do is to believe that there is something better to go to. When in the throes of an eating disorder, that is the hardest thing to believe – that there is a way out, but there is – for everybody.

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